well here i am again. writting a journal that really concerns no one but myself.
i am at last on top of my game! however i am still under a pile of paper work and reading.
i havnt eaten much today. actually.. at all. i have however consumed some delicious apple water which is my drink of choice now.
i am supposed to write a paper on the last book we read in lit.
however the problem is.. i didnt get the book. however i talked to my teacher and i think i got everything sorted out.
im stressed.
between a hell mess of an unclean room, and noisy tv watching parents there isnt a quiet place to turn to. i considered the library but i usually run into someone there who i dont really want to see but have to talk to.
work sucks. i need to find a job that i actually enjoy and will allow me to read the novellas i am stuck with in my lit class.
i need to take summer classes now, and i refuse to let anything get in the way of musical. i just want to do a show so dang bad. but i have this looming feeling i wont get in. so much of me wants to say "no" and not do it. but i cant help but have the urge to do it. i need to prove to myself i am still worth something in THAT department.
i finally found a career i am actually interested.
only that means traveling to denver to talk to people about the interestingness that is their job. and trying to convince the people at the arts museum here that i am actually half worth their time. AND on top of that i will probly do some volunteer work with the house downtown so i can get some museum credits under way.
i will have to take design classes, graphic classes, and some other computer stuff which means i will be needing a new computer.
and on top of that.. cramps.
my life. in a bell jar.

ok. must move on to finding the symbolism in color in the book "heart of darkness" (THE HORROR! the horror!) <---quote from the text...
as well as getting maimed for my rather lame singing method last night at recitle. i shot myself in the foot at that one